Finding Your Path

Some of the most commonly asked questions and discussions I have been involved in over the years relate to the topic of finding direction and purpose in one’s life. A growing number of people are uncertain about what to do with their lives, how to add value to it, provide meaning for it or to simply find some measure of personal peace or happiness in it. A common point I make is that one’s path is not about finding some ideal vocation and that the idea of a path in life is essentially a spiritual one. A path is as much an expression of our individuality or uniqueness as it is a direction, purpose or intent. I believe that when we commit to a path that is best for us we create an empowering and energizing synergy. The synergy we develop between the outside world and ourselves truly enriches everyone.

People have asked me for help in directing them to a path that would be suitable for them. At times, I have found the urge to answer tempting, notably when what they need to do may seem obvious to me. What I have done instead is to provide council rather than directly advise them of a path. The reason is simple, and goes beyond the idea that no one really knows what is good or beneficial for others. This statement is generally true; however, the fact is that by telling people what to do we are doing more harm than good.

By telling people what we feel they need to do, outside of situations where an individual would be in serious jeopardy without intervention, we take away their opportunity to learn for themselves. Those seeking to find their path need to consider that while others can advise us they do not know what is best for us. Our personal intent and desire must be in line with our path or conflicts will arise. Even more basic is that it will be our path, and we must take ownership over the decision, be committed to it and accept full responsibility for it.

One’s life path and their individual uniqueness are related. Finding the right path means getting to know ourselves first. Nor do we need permission to express ourselves in ways that may be quite different from what others would do. What we need is a stronger sense and awareness of self. Anyone who chooses to answer such questions for others needs to examine their reasons for  believing they know better and perhaps why they feel it appropriate to tell another how to live. One should try to understand and consider what others might suggest for us or their ideas about what would be of benefit, and then remember that we walk our own path.

"To think that anyone but ourselves would know more about our journey is wonderfully amusing" Larry DiTommaso

Everyone has heard that life is a journey and not a destination. As we journey through life, we can do so with a path in mind. A path does not have to be specific at first, or necessarily ever. It could be one we deliberately set, one with no deliberate intent or it could lie somewhere in between. We can have more than one path going at any given time, so long as they are not in conflict. Even not choosing a path sets us on one all the same. Which of these ways is better? I would say that no path is necessarily better or worse than another is. One may have taken the specific path of healer, teacher or builder, a path of personal excellence in a field or personal pursuit, a general path such as service to others where possible, trying to be a better person or following a road less travelled or no chosen no path at all. In this later case, I am not talking about people who drift through life aimlessly, though we will learn regardless of which we choose to do.

Typically when people think about a path in life they think in specific terms such as one’s vocation, their pursuit of wealth, their support for family or community or the types of personal pursuits they engage in. I would argue that while one's vocation, monetary status and so on can be an aspect or part of someone's path they are not the likely the path itself, they are a reflection or manifestation of who we are. This would be like saying that what we do shows the kind of person we are inside, rather than the kind of person we are shows in what we do. These are not equivalent statements and to think so further shows how externally oriented we may have become. That so many see it the other way around is not surprising, for if as a whole humanity understood this we would be better off than we are. Few realize that the type of life they lead, they types of jobs they have and so forth are the external expression of who they are on the inside. They reflect our uniqueness through the prism of our experiences and our reactions to them.

Rare exceptions aside, the only way for us to know our path is to have reflected on what who we are, what we stand for, our strengths and weaknesses, what we love to do and what we have manifested in this life as a result of them. We should also consider what we would have liked to do but were not able to. If you have looked within, have observed yourself and the life you lead and feel you have a good idea of whom you are and what your life’s path is then continue to follow it with all the passion you have. Those in this group need only to work on the challenges they face on their path such as the influence of others, self-doubts or second thoughts. If you have not looked within then this is where you start. The challenge of discovering ones path may seem insurmountable, perhaps pointless to those who have looked but been unable to find it or those who have never considered it. Even if you have not found it do not dismay, it is not crucial to know one's path, it  is our consideration of self that is of benefit.

Questions about one’s path in life such as “What is my path?” or “Am I on the right path?” are difficult to answer from the outside. There are far too many factors and intangibles to have a pat answer. However, one can start to answer these types of questions for themselves. While there is no set method for determining your path in life there are ways to go about doing this. One should not choose their path arbitrarily or casually simply because it seems to fit, or one prefers it to alternative. Nor should one assume that their lack of awareness of their path means they are not on one. So, step one of this part of your journey is self-examination.

I have mentioned that a life path is a spiritual one by its nature for it implies that there is some purpose to life, for our being alive. There have been countless scholars of all stripes, from scientists, philosophers and lay people to spiritual and religious leaders, who have laid out their perspectives on the meaning of life and its purpose. These perspectives, based on interpretation of observations or doctrine only become personal views for us when we accept them. This begs the question: what have you already accepted as personal truths?

Naturally, as part of self-examination, there are many questions one must ask of themselves. Some of the key ones are:

“What do I believe about who and what I am?”
“What kind of person am I?”
“Do I believe there is a purpose to life?”
“Do I have a purpose for my life?”
"What beliefs do I hold?”
“Why do I believe what I do?”
“Are my beliefs based on what I have learned or on what I’ve been told and accepted?”
“Am I willing to act based on my beliefs?”
“Am I fully committed to my beliefs?”
“Do I like the person I am right now?”
“What are my natural gifts?”

We struggle with finding our path when life is tough or when we have uncertainty around who we are and why we are here. This internal struggle leads us away from being in balance with life, the greater the struggle the further away we get. The inner beauty and strength we have is less likely to manifest in our lives if we cannot see it in ourselves. By observing our own lives, by asking ourselves direct questions and trying to answer them honestly we shed light on our inner selves. As we come to know and understand our beliefs, we start to see where they are in conflict with each other. We see where our beliefs are in harmony and empower us as well as where they unnecessary or poorly formulated and adversely affect on our choices and lives.

If you lack a clear understanding of the type of person you are inside then a clear path is certainly a challenge. This does not mean you should give up, as a spiritual path is not a specific road one follows; it is a choice in direction. One can choose, for example, to become a better person, help others in need, or to find oneself rather than base it on vague notions, what you read in a book or what others might suggest for you. You do not need to have the qualities you would like to in order to begin to develop them. You should try to find your path through thoughtful consideration, and to have results you must commit yourself to it.

Base your path on what you feel deep down inside is right for you, one that resonates with you. Actions find their base in choices. Choices find their base in thoughts, which in turn are the result of previous experiences, as are what one believes. By looking at ourselves honestly, we can see we have acted in opposition to or in cooperation with what we believe. We can even examine and learn to understand the reasons behind our choices. People often believe “something” but cannot explain why they believe it. Nor do we usually remember all the beliefs we have so we do not notice that some may be preventing us from seeing or understanding our path.

Do you question your worthiness? Do you question your ability to find peace in this life? Do you question your ability to serve to the benefit of all? Do you question your right to live the way you feel is right for you?  If you do question any of these then you have some long held beliefs tucked away in your rational mind of which you are not aware. When we begin to re-evaluate our beliefs and the choices we have made we must do so deliberately, we must be a warrior in our pursuit of self-awareness. This means being ruthlessly honest with ourselves, and taking full responsibility for our lives.

As we learn through experience, our answers to the above questions will shift. This is not an issue as the actual answers themselves are not as important as the act of asking and trying to answer. So how does this help one find their path?

Among the spiritual perspectives I have encountered I believe those that look at fundamental aspects of what we can express as embodied spiritual beings as the best. One of these suggests that there are seven fundamental planes and we are influenced by the archetypes of one or more of these planes. These seven archetypes can be stated as (reference to Ernest Wood, The Seven Rays, 1925):

1. The person of will who seeks freedom by mastering self and environment (ruler)
2. The person of love who seeks unity through sympathy (philanthropist)
3. The person of thought who seeks to comprehend through the study of life (philosopher)
4. The person of imagination who seeks harmony in a three-fold way through unifying the internal and external worlds (magician, actor, symbolic artist or poet)
5. The person of thought who seeks truth in the world (scientist)
6. The person of love who seeks God as goodness in the world (devotee)
7. The person of will who is seeking the beauty that is God manifest in the world (craftsman or artist)

You will note the word God in the above. I do not use the term casually. At the same time, do not confuse my use of the word with any particular definition of what God is for such a definition is beyond our awareness at this point in our evolution. Hence, I am not referring to the God as espoused by any particular religion or as taking any defined form as depicted by man. We can conceive of “God” in many ways, as a result I am referring to God as the source of all that we are and not as an individualized consciousness. Hence, the devotee seeks the goodness in the world as represented by the gift of life, love, beauty and so forth. In the case of the artisan, it is the beauty of creation that touches him or her and the remarkable reflection of the divine that inspires.

How you choose to define or perceive of God is personal to you and is only relevant in this context in terms of our recognition that there is something greater than we are or beyond our perception and we have a relationship to it. Our consciousness in all its capabilities is but a tiny part of that greater whole and we are subject to the capabilities of expression built up in that greater whole over aeons of time. We can try to resist our inherent qualities and as a result have to deal with the consequences of our choices, but we cannot change them.

From (Leadbeater, The Masters and The Path, 1925)
Anyone who hears about the Masters and Their teaching, if he has any grasp at all of what it means and involves, must instantly be seized with a most intense desire to understand Them and enter Their service; the more he learns the more does he become filled with the wonder and beauty and glory of God' s plan, and the more anxious does he become to take part in the work. Once he has realized that God has a plan of evolution, he wants to be a fellow-labourer with God, and nothing else can possibly bring satisfaction.

I will shift for a moment at this point from overall life paths as one may have issues that are more pressing. In such cases, resolving any of these is also part of your path. See them as stepping stones along the way. The material on this site will help you to find and work on your issues. It may be best to tackle them one at a time as they arise in your life as presented to you by your experiences. Choose the one you can handle or the one you that, if unattended, could result in the most harm, and do so with passion.

Life can be tough with harsh lessons that seem cruel. We may feel we can be so much more yet also believe that life has dealt us a losing hand. I understand that it can be hard to accept that what we experience in our lives is for our learning; however, accepting this will be of immense benefit. Further, denying responsibility over the events in our lives makes it very difficult to remove the issue that gave rise to our problems. If we do not clear what is within us, which is the source of our problem, the problems will continue to manifest in one form or another. Our lack of balance is never someone else’s fault. We can choose to blame or accept responsibility.

We cannot avoid our lessons; we can only defer them, often leading to harsher consequences later. Our lessons are part of our journey and our path, and in order to progress we need to lose our fear of them. We need to embrace them and move past them, only then can we begin to be as we imagine ourselves.

"The obstacle is the path..." Zen proverb

For those who feel they already know their lives path the question may be one of certainty in it or surety of it being the correct one. However, in terms of a life path: specification is not required, personal awareness of self and dedication and devotion to something greater or beyond ourselves is. Whether that awareness is about one’s strengths or weaknesses or what one likes or loves to do what is important is intent and desire. If you remain faithful to your intent and continue to try to grow and learn, you will find your way past the uncertainty.

Our dedication and devotion should not be part time endeavours applied only in certain areas though this is not to belittle the fact that some effort is better than making no effort at all. Yet it remains true that all paths require some form of commitment and the spiritual path is one that requires this in spades for going further along this path requires dedication, compassion, devotion and love for all creation.

The commitment I refer to is not to any particular belief system. The commitment is more to the idea that there is greater purpose to life than simply living for ourselves, that we are not separate from each other, and that what each of us does matters. Accepting this commitment is the way we learn to accept and love ourselves and to allow what it inside of you to shine forth. For many this means clearing old issues, removing blocks and losing judgement so one can open up to the wondrous beauty all around and within us. Do not fear the commitment. You will find it easier as your dedication and devotion grows on the journey.

When you are looking to find your path recognize that you can find the answers you seek by looking within. No one knows you or your life the way you do.  Your experiences may have occurred in the past yet they remain within you; explore them. Resist the urge to ask others what they think we should be doing. Ask instead what they think in general and why they may think that. Consider anything they may say objectively, do not take it personally and take any advice given with a few grains of salt. Use all feedback you get in your exploration and then define your life for yourself. This way you will not need reassurance or validation from others.

During your journey accept what knowledge comes your way without reservation but do not let each variation steer you in a new direction. There are many paths to happiness, wisdom or knowledge; however, they all have variations and so it is important to choose one that suits your temperament and thought constructs. The thought constructs of the Western World are different from those in the east, as traditions, history and collective awareness vary between cultures. If you cast your net too wide, you will likely find you have thoughts that are in opposition to each other. This is not to say one is right and the other wrong, just that they can have conflicting ideas. Conflicting beliefs make progress more challenging as our minds struggle to reconcile the differences. The result is mental and likely emotional blocks to progress in any area that has a commonality with them or for which they may be the foundation. It is good to expose oneself to ideas from all the major spiritual schools to expand awareness of the diversity of thought and schema’s. At the same time, do no not try to embrace them all until you have sufficient knowledge to understand the subtle variations in doctrine. These variations do not affect the truth of what is stated rather the way we relate to the “truth”. When you do choose, embrace it, but do not assume that it is the only path or that it is the only way to view ourselves or and wondrous Cosmos around us.

The intent of the material presented here is not to provide you with a path; rather it is to serve as a guide to clearing the way so you can find your own path. While each of us must find our own purpose or path in life, you will find that when you do find your path you will not be walking alone.

© 2009 Allan Beveridge